Things I will do differently in my next relationship

1. I will leave when I first think of leaving instead of sticking in for years and making it complicated
   
   
2. I will be myself and do what I like
   
   
3. Be Happy
   
   
4. I will not get so close to their friends; so that I don't lose my closest friends and my relationship all at once
   
   
5. I will not give them my passwords/ pin number resulting in me having to change everything and forget my passwords
   
   
6. I will not get so close to their family that I am breaking up with them too
   
   
7. I will probably fail and do all of the above because that's what you do when you are crazy in love.
   

Day Ten: One confession

1. I am in the process of reinventing/ ending a three year relationship which is why I took this ten day challenge in the first place. I honestly don't feel like it helped me sort out anything on little bit.

Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.

1. :D
   
   
2. :S

I am simultaneously really happy, yes sadly confused. I don't think I've worked out anything.

Day Eight: Three turn ons.

This is easy; I have some idea of what turns me on. These don't necessarily come across the same in every person, and just because someone has these traits doesn't mean I'll be turned on by them; but if you don't have these I most likely won't be turned on by you (unless we have amazing raw sexual magnetism together)

1. A similar sense of humor
   
   
2. A similar level of intelligence/ line of thinking (The ability to have good banter is now a must for me)
   
   
3. An intoxicating smell (and let's get down to biology; if I don't like your smell we are too similarly matched genetically; if I am infatuated with your smell we are biological opposites which do in fact attract)
   

is it just me...

or is tumblr mainly a bunch of pro-ana blogs?

Maybe it's only the ones that I stumble across but the amount of pro-anorexic blogs I see on there makes me want to stick to my blogger with my 3 followers.

Just saying.

Day Seven: Four turn offs.

Now this is easy

1. Smoking/ drug or excessive alcohol use (basically any unnatural altered state of consciousness)
   
   
2. Abusiveness (That is controlling one through your words, influence, actions and violence)
   
   
3. Stupidity/ unintelligibly
   
   
4. Immaturity (as opposed to being fun)
   

Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)

There are more than six people that mean A LOT to me; it's very hard to choose. And you say no particular order but obviously the person I thought of first is the one that means the most to me; but I won't write it down in that order.

1. Zoe
   
2. Cameron
   
3. Fiona
   
4. Ben
   
5. Chris
   
6. Nana
   

Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.

Most days I would say that I have no regrets, that everything I have done or had done to me has shaped me into this person I am today. Of course there is always the test bias that says I cannot know, had I have not done these things I 'wish I'd never', that my life would in fact be better; it could easily be worse or maybe even just the same. There are times when I am down and have regrets then, but in the harsh light of morning they all go away.

1. Ending some relationships the way I did
   
   
2. Giving up in year 12 and not studying
   
   
3. Staying in bad situations when I should have walked away
   
   
4. Going on hormone treatment
   
   
5. Not doing what I want to do for so long
   
   
6. Hurting you
   

Some of these are what I'm working on and changing. But all of these are what made me the me that I am today.

Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot

I missed a day, but i suppose it didn't say day four was the 4th day in a sequence it was just Day 4 of posting.

I spend a lot of time thinking about really random things. Such as, how does facebook now recognise peoples faces when you tag places. The things that probably cross my mind the most...

1. My weight
2. How things work
3. The universe
4. Certain people
5. Certain events from the past
6. Things I want to do
7. Studying overseas

Thigh Highs and suspender belts

I have a sudden love for thigh highs and suspender belts. I know that the invention of the panty-hoes was suppose to be this amazing moment in woman's history and the only people that wear thigh highs and suspender belts are hookers and the elderly but they are just so much more comfortable and easier to wear.

Don't you think?

Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.

Well this is difficult again. I think it is pretty hard to win my heart, not many people have managed this and it always happens when you least expect it with the less expected person. Just because a person has or doesn't have 8 qualities does not mean they will get my heart. A series of random events, many more than 8 and many more than we are even aware of, is what lets someone win your heart. Even if events lead you together, the time may not be right. It all gets very complicated. Let's do it anyway though, just for shits and giggles

1. Be intelligent and passionate
   
   
2. Make me laugh
   
   
3. Make me smile when I think of you randomly throughout the day
   
   
4. Remember things and get to know me
   
   
5. Have an irresistible smell that lingers in my hair/clothes/sheets for days leading to number 3
   
   
6. Be honest and open
   
   
7. Be responsive to text/ calls/ emails
   
   
8. Be yourself.
   

Day Two: Nine things about yourself.

Nine things about me...

1. I'm 21
   
   
2. I'm studying IT and working full time at IBM
   
   
3. I'm confused as hell at a lot of things in my life at the moment
   
   
4. I want to run away and travel the world, but I'm too scared to take the first leap.
   
   
5. I used to be very, very underweight but now I'm fat and trying to get back to a healthy middle
   
   
6. I'm not sure I am a good person anymore
   
   
7. I've been really sick the past year (1 year and 9 days since I got sick) and am still not 100% recovered
   
   
8. Sometimes I prefer to spend time with animals than people
   
   
9. I'm trying to become the best version of me that I can be
   

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.

Usually I just try to say what is on my mind to people anyway; but here goes nothing.

I've sat here for a few minutes with the number 1 on my screen; maybe I'm not brave enough to name names.

1. You have a problem with alcohol; you need to get help; even randoms asked me about it
   
   
2. You have a problem with food; you need to get help; people asked me about it
   
   
3. You have been incredibly helpful but it's not making my decisions any easier
   
   
4. I will miss you (This could actually be said to a lot of different people)
   
   
5. I'm sorry (ditto above)
   
   
6. This isn't who you are
   
   
7. You getting involved in my business doesn't help; it actually makes it harder
   
   
8. Don't judge me when you don't know the full story.
   
   
9. I hate you for what you did to me and I will never, ever forgive you
   
   
10. You make my day brighter and bring my smile back
    

Ten Day Challenge

You may have seen this challenge going around on blogs that you follow and I've decided that I need to do this for me. I've found that I'm not the person I used to be, nor the person I thought I would ever be. I'm still me but I'm trying to take some time out, reassess and become a better version of me. I think I'll even start today.

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession